I recently read The Anatomy of Peace: Resolving the Heart of Conflict, by the Arbinger Institute. This is a great book to read, with life-changing lessons if you open yourself up to it. A good reminder of how much our way of being influences the success we have in our relationships, both at home or in the workplace.
This is a book worth reading and studying repeatedly, like Leadership and Self-deception by the same authors.
The main focus of the book comes down to The Peacemaking Pyramid. We spend our lives in either two ways: helping things go right, or dealing with things that are going wrong. It makes sense that it is better and more effective to work first at helping things to go right! The steps to helping things go right include:
- Get out of the box/Obtain a heart at peace
- Build relationships with others who have influence
- Build the relationship
- Listen & learn
- Teach & communicate
In the dealing with things that are going right, the only action is to Correct.
Reading both books will explain more fully what getting out the box really means, so I definitely encourage further reading and review!